I’m a little bit embarrassed to admit that I’ve been devouring all of the gossip concerning the finalization of Brad and Angelina’s divorce. My rationale is that I’m a divorce mediator, so I need to look at it for professional purposes.
So much about their divorce is both amazing and appalling to me. And the online comments are also amazing and appalling. The anonymous judgments by strangers who know nothing about these people but simply blame and shame because they can, brings to my mind the old proverb, “people in glass houses shouldn’t throw stones.”
I have no interest in commenting about married people cheating on their spouses. What I am interested in is why this divorce took eight years to finalize. Eight years?
Full disclosure, I haven’t read the actual court filings, and quite frankly, I assumed the filings were confidential so I didn’t even try. What I did read were tabloid articles from “sources close” and then I derived my own conclusions.
I believe that both Brad and Angelina were consumed with proving each was right and the other was wrong. And further, I think that their positions were fueled by their respective attorneys. This is especially so because of the high profile of this case, and the posturing of counsel who also probably wanted to prove their own legal prowess by claiming the win. In addition to the exorbitant legal fees (I can only imagine), I’m sure that Brad and Angelina had to pay for expert witnesses, court costs, travel expenses, and whatever else the attorneys saw fit to charge their clients.
But financial issues aren’t the only toll of an eight year process. There’s also the stress, anxiety, resentment, and anger to consider, especially when these emotions involve co-parenting. Brad and Angelina had six children together, most of whom are now adults, and (I’m guessing here) none of whom had especially close relationships with their dad. I even read that several of the adult kids were taking legal measures to remove “Pitt” as their last name.
Living with the uncertainty of a prolonged divorce litigation certainly creates an emotional toll on the children. I don’t know what information the kids were being given about their parents’ divorce, especially where they were going to live and with whom, finances, holidays, and all of the other potential disruptions to their day-to-day lives. I do know, however, that the kids didn’t ask for this, nor did they sign on to being the subject of a high-profile divorce. Unfortunately, this will affect them for the rest of their lives.
Can you guess why I’m obsessed about this divorce? Obviously, if Brad and Angelina would have contacted me in the first place, we could have had everything finished within a few months, and they would have been free to move on with their lives, co-parenting with respect, and banking a ton of money for their kids’ future.
Nobody wins in court. It’s just a matter of who gets hurt worse.
