There’s No Such Thing as an Impasse (Three Minute Read)
We’ve all been stuck in a conflict that ends with an impasse. Co-workers who refuse additional responsibility, teenagers who won’t respect a curfew, spouses who “forget” to mention use of the debit card, are just a few typical examples. There are global examples of...Consideration and Civility (Three Minute Read)
Some of my lifelong values, thanks to the teachings of my parents, are to be respectful and to show consideration for others. Although I didn’t actually realize it during my childhood, they were also teaching my siblings and me about civility. Without diminishing the...
Telling the Family (Three Minute Read)
I will never forget my mother’s reaction when I told her that I was getting divorced. (Out of respect, I’m not going to quote her . . . but if you want to know, comment on this blog and I’ll tell you.) Obviously, it’s never easy telling your...
What is the Definition of “MINO?” (Three Minute Read)
“MINO” is an acronym standing for “married in name only.” I’ll start by telling you about a well-known professional athlete who had both a wife and a mistress. Each knew about the other, and they all went to great lengths to avoid...
Balance is Vital (Three Minute Read)
I’ve written about the importance of balance several times over the years and, not surprisingly, the topic keeps showing up in divorce mediation when my clients are discussing finances and, more importantly, when they’re talking about co-parenting. Do...
You’re The Expert In Your Own Life (Three Minute Read)
It seems to happen more often than not in divorce mediation. “My friend told me . . .” or “my brother says . . .” The information we receive from our support system is always well-intended. But is it actually helpful? I’m big on giving advice,...
Do Your Intentions Align with Their Perceptions? (Three Minute Read)
When I was in college, I had a poster in my dorm room with the words “I know you think you understand what you thought I said but I’m not sure you realize that what you heard is not what I meant.” Credit for the quote goes to Alan Greenspan, the famous economist and...
At the End of the Day, it’s Not the End of the World! (Three Minute Read)
Drama is everywhere. We all get caught up in it, whether by watching the news or letting reality television suck us dry. (By the way, I’m guilty of doing both.) In divorce mediation, the drama is both real and exaggerated. Ending a relationship is real and...
The Blame Puzzle (Three Minute Read)
We all know them. The blamers. The ones who are the quickest to deny responsibility or accountability. Instead, they say things like, “it wasn’t my fault,” or “I missed the deadline because my assistant’s kid was sick.” When I’m working with my divorce...
What if Mediation Isn’t an Option? (Three Minute Read)
I conduct an initial (free) consultation with prospective clients to see whether mediation would be a good fit for their situation. Most often, I don’t have to sell the concept because they’re already open to it simply because they booked an appointment....
Showing Up Is Not About Being Ready (Three Minute Read)
My nephew, who’s a motivational speaker, talked to me about “showing up.” My takeaway was the thought that showing up is both easy and difficult at the same time. It’s rarely about confidence or clarity. Most of the time, it’s about...Free Initial Consultation!
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