Some labels are important. After all, I don’t want to grab jar of orange marmalade when I’m really looking for apricot preserves. Other than the important ones (like those on wine bottles), I dislike labels. I don’t like the scratchy ones inside my t-shirts, and I don’t like the ones that are impossible to remove from photo frames. And I especially don’t like the ones we apply to people.
So I try to avoid them. I mean, realistically not all teenagers are self-absorbed, not all blondes are dumb, not all chefs are overweight, not all scientists are nerds, and so on.
Stereotyping can be dangerous, at home and at work. The risks at home are fairly obvious. When you label people in front of your kids, are you teaching them to judge others by the way they look or talk? Are you teaching them that different is wrong?
The risks of labeling in the workplace are more subtle. Colleagues and co-workers are more than just their gender, their race, their title, or their work experience. When we start looking for things to validate our preconceived notions, our minds begin to close. As a legal administrator back in the day, I was tasked with hiring and firing the support staff. I screened resumes, conducted interviews, and made the final decisions. Once when I was hiring a new receptionist, there was a well-dressed candidate in the lobby. The managing partner must have gotten a glimpse of her and he popped into my office to tell me not to hire her because she was fat. He said, and I am dead serious, that fat people were lazy. He must have come to that erroneous conclusion at some point in his life, and after that his mind closed. (By the way, she was over-qualified and although I offered her the job, she declined.)
There are lots of examples of labeling in the workplace. If you’re a mother, you might be labeled as disloyal when you choose to stay home with your sick kid. If you’re struggling to make ends meet and choose to work overtime, you might be labeled as overly-ambitious by your married, dual-income colleague who’s not strapped for cash. And the simple fact that you’re in your 20s, or in your 60s, might lead to false labeling in the workplace. Do co-workers who live with their parents, or seniors who are supplementing their Social Security income need lower salaries than people who are raising children? These are all erroneous conclusions that close our minds.
How can we avoid the stereotype trap? First, try adding the word “some” to your observations. Some mothers take off work when their kids are sick, or some senior citizens aren’t totally dependent on their salaries.
Better yet, catch yourself when you start to label. Instead of referring to your neighbor by his race, try using his name. Your gay friends are simply your friends, right? Diversity is interesting. Respecting differences and having an open mind is admirable. At least to me.
