It should be against the law to steal someone else’s time.
Wow, I didn’t realize how strongly I felt until I actually wrote the preceding sentence!
Time matters a lot to me. For instance, I’m obsessively punctual and I have little patience for people who are continually “running a little late.” Any professional who gets paid by the hour knows that time is money. So does any service provider who schedules customers. Imagine if your first customer of the day was “running a little late” to the tune of 15 minutes, thereby causing you to run behind your entire day. How would you feel? Vandalized by a time thief?
Obviously, we all get the occasional flat tire or are stuck in an unusual traffic jam (unless you live in Southern California where traffic jams are never unusual). We aren’t time thieves in those types of situations, and as long as it’s not habitual, I’m in favor of dismissing the charges.
On the other hand, there are numerous examples of inexcusable time thievery. I invite you to check your time etiquette against the following list of misdemeanors:
- Interrupting a colleague’s work time/space with the phrase, “this will only take a second”
- Calling someone when an email will suffice and is usually the better choice
- Violating normal time boundaries (sending middle-of-the-night texts, for example)
- Not returning phone calls within a reasonable amount of time
- Sending instant messages instead of a text or email (the notification tone always startles me)
- Unnecessary follow-up inquiries (“did you get my email?”)
- Not holding up your end of the deal
- Hanging up without leaving a message (acceptable only in the case of a “butt-dial” — and not to be over-used)
- Creating a time crunch due to your own procrastination
- Failing to adequately prepare resulting in the need for bail-out
- Being late
Of course, there are ways to thwart a time thief. You can put your phone on “do not disturb” before you get into bed. Those magic words in the form of a sign on your door or cubicle will also help in an office situation when you truly do not want to be disturbed. You can tell the follow-up inquirer to simply assume you received the email and that you’ll do your best to promptly reply. (Then keep your word.) The constant procrastinator would likely benefit by receiving a deadline accompanied by appropriate consequences. The hanger-upper deserves a return call irrespective of whether there was a voicemail (we can certainly demonstrate better time etiquette in doing so). And what would happen if you started without the constantly late person?
Notwithstanding the above suggestions and not surprisingly, I believe the most effective way to reduce time theft is . . . wait for it . . . to communicate your expectations in advance so as to leave no doubt.
Do you have any other examples of how your time is stolen by others? What have you done to eliminate time theft in your own life? Extra points from me if your methods are devious!
Waiting for others who are “running late” is inexcusable. Plan ahead to anticipate delays. After all, my time is just as valuable as anyone else’s time. The way I try to eliminate time theft is to be early. If others know I will be early, they will try to be on time.
One if my daughter’s was ALWAYS late to arrive. I’m happy to report, since getting together with her boyfriend, he gets her to be more cognizant of her timeliness. Like you mentioned, when all were present at family dinners; we would just start without her!
Great article!
Regarding the email, a best practice is to request confirmation that it was received. A follow up to confirm is a sound back up, nonetheless. Assumptions can be dangerous (ask Don Miguel Ruiz – The 4 Agreements). Thanks for sharing Nancy.
I’m like you, Nancy. ‘Always’ either early or on time. Yes, I encounter time-stealers quite frequently and if their bad habit continues…I don’t. But, as I ‘always’ say, “Time flies like an arrow but fruit flies like a banana.”
Doctors running late…how we all hate that. After working in an office for ten years, I truly understand why. So don’t let your time in the wait room be a time thief. Bring work, bring a book, play games on your phone. It will result in better blood pressure when you are finally taken through that magical door.
Rather than wait on people, I usually give a time frame that I’m available or am wanting to meet up and if it happens to be a task or plan that requires punctuality or I have plans following the current plan, I communicate that I’m on a tight schedule and would like to meet up and take care of Said plan or task within a desired amount of time. I also communicate when and if I have other plans going on, to give the person a heads up and an indirect prompt to be punctual and to communicate that I’m on a “time limit” for lack of better words.
We all have a set number of minutes in our lives and no one knows how many so OUR time is precious. In grocery checkout lines when the people in front of you realize they were born on the same planet and want to tell their life story to each other.I always tell them (in a nice way) that I have to be somewhere which is true—-anywhere but there. When filling out my info for a new DR I write at the bottom of the page that I will only wait 30 minutes past my appointment time then leave. I have become quite familiar with the term A-hole. Oh well it’s my life.
Anyone who facilitates a meeting knows how disruptive it is when someone is chronically late to a meeting they regularly attend. It’s like “look at me I’m so busy and important” It stops everyone’s train of thought and focus. It’s rude and disrespectful.
When people say “that’s just how she or he is and accept it as ok, I remind them of the other people in the room that may not feel so accepting.