Supporting an Upset Friend or Partner (Three Minute Read)

Supporting an Upset Friend or Partner (Three Minute Read)

Let’s start with a quick quiz:Question 1: Your spouse just got fired. Do you (a) sit quietly and listen to how it all came down, or (b) suggest that he look at the situation from another perspective?Question 2: Your office mate just told you she had sex with her...
Pivot! Pivot! (Three Minute Read)

Pivot! Pivot! (Three Minute Read)

What comes to your mind when you read the title of this article?  Is it the commonly used term for a basketball fundamental?  Or is it the “Friends” episode with Ross and the sofa?  Dictionary.com had 14 definitions for the word.  My favorite is #6: ...
You Need to Just Calm Down (Three Minute Read)

You Need to Just Calm Down (Three Minute Read)

Tempers often flare during divorce and custody mediations, so dealing with emotions is a large part of what I do.For example, last year I worked with a divorcing couple who had two kids. According to “Molly,” her husband had a drinking problem. “Mike” admitted that he...
Taking the High Road (Three Minute Read)

Taking the High Road (Three Minute Read)

Have you ever lost your wallet? Do you remember that sinking feeling in the pit of your stomach at the moment you realized it was gone?  You retraced your steps and then contacted the store manager, who told you that it had just been turned in to the lost and found. ...
It’s All About the Grandchildren (Three Minute Read)

It’s All About the Grandchildren (Three Minute Read)

One of life’s greatest joys (I am told) is being a grandparent. It’s likely one of the purest expressions of unconditional love, ranking right up there with how your dog or cat feels about you at dinnertime.   Pure? Yes.  And complicated?  Maybe. ...
Wiping the Slate Clean (Three Minute Read)

Wiping the Slate Clean (Three Minute Read)

As a divorce and family mediator, I sometimes think I specialize in the grudges of others.  And I confess, I’ve had one or two of my own (although seriously, not more than two).  Do we forgive and forget?  I think not.  Forgiveness is easier for me than...
Can Grief and Joy Co-Exist? (Three Minute Read)

Can Grief and Joy Co-Exist? (Three Minute Read)

“The deeper that sorrow carves into your being, the more joy you can contain.” ~ Khalil GibranFor more than five years, I’ve had the privilege of volunteering for www.AdamsPlaceLV.org, which is a phenomenal non-profit helping children to deal with the loss of a...
I’m Very Sorry (Three Minute Read)

I’m Very Sorry (Three Minute Read)

Let me tell you about a divorce mediation I conducted with a couple ending their 30-year marriage.  “Mary” was determined to share that she had read a text on “Bill’s” phone that she obviously wasn’t meant to see. I let her vent about Bill’s infidelity and looked for...
My Feelings Are Hurt (Three Minute Read)

My Feelings Are Hurt (Three Minute Read)

I’ll admit it right here and right now.  I’m sensitive.  I take most things seriously and personally.  To be clear, what I’m talking about here is not the Mount Everest of abuse and betrayal. Rather, I’m on the first rung of a small ladder, looking at some...
Do I Talk Too Much?  (Three Minute Read)

Do I Talk Too Much? (Three Minute Read)

Let’s start out with a confession: my childhood nickname was “Mighty Mouth.”  Turns out I’m still a talker.  And a writer, which is why I force myself to keep my weekly blogs to a maximum of 500 words.   According to Patricia Marx, a staff...
Arguing in Front of the Kids (Three Minute Read)

Arguing in Front of the Kids (Three Minute Read)

In more than 11 years of being a divorce mediator, I’ve seen my share of marital arguments.  (And I’ve had plenty of my own.)  When my divorcing clients confess to me that they fight in front of their kids, I try not to react, even though it conjures up...
Blackmail: The Emotional Kind (Three Minute Read)

Blackmail: The Emotional Kind (Three Minute Read)

The clock is ticking.  The holidays are fast approaching, and your fuse is as short as daylight in December. You’ve got many things on your to-do list and not enough time or money to get them done. So, you lash out at your partner, finally telling her what you’ve been...